The plan is to take a year’s trip along the Silk Road from Pejë to Tokyo - the oldest highway of ideas. No plans, no bookings, no rigidness, just slowly moving towards destination through some of the most amazing places in the world. The only rule is not to fly.
Route: Kosovo, Greece, Mount Athos, Turkey, Armenia, Georgia, Azerbaijan, Turkmenistan, Tajikistan, Kyrgyzstan, Uzbekistan, Kazakhstan, China, Mongolia, Japan… Unfortunately, I probably won’t be able to go to Iran, which is one of the most exciting segments of the Silk Road due to being a British passport holder. I don’t really blame them, considering the shameless meddling of UK govs in their internal affairs, including overthrowing a democratic government, erm, for oil.
Not sure when or if I’ll be back in the civilised west. I think I’m civilised enough.. I will probably have enough time to think about where home is… or maybe there isn’t one. That’s fine too. Some people are citizens of nowhere, as Theresa May once said.
This royal throne of kings, this scepter'd isle,
This earth of majesty, this seat of Mars,
This other Eden, demi-paradise,
This fortress built by Nature for herself
Against infection and the hand of war,
This happy breed of men, this little world,
This precious stone set in the silver sea,
Which serves it in the office of a wall,
Or as a moat defensive to a house,
Against the envy of less happier lands,
This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England,
This nurse, this teeming womb of royal kings,
Fear'd by their breed and famous by their birth,
Renowned for their deeds as far from home
For Christian service and true chivalry,
As is the sepulchre in stubborn Jewry,
Of the world's ransom, blessed Mary's Son,
This land of such dear souls, this dear dear land,
Dear for her reputation through the world,
Is now leased out, I die pronouncing it,
Like to a tenement or pelting farm:
England, bound in with the triumphant sea
Whose rocky shore beats back the envious siege
Of watery Neptune, is now bound in with shame,
With inky blots and rotten parchment bonds:
That England, that was wont to conquer others,
Hath made a shameful conquest of itself.
Ah, would the scandal vanish with my life,
How happy then were my ensuing death!
William Shakespeare
King Richard II, 2nd Act
If being Woke is about awareness, fairness , understanding…….. if it is agaiinst racism, fascism, misogyny, homophobia, transphobia, white supremacy, holocaust denial, statue worship, empire glorifying, and all other forms of discrimination and prejudice, I choose Woke. Of course. Domt you?
The Tories are the cancer of the soul - CANCERVATIVES should be their name. I don’t hate them. I loathe them. They represent the lowest human instincts. England will disintegrate if it is not cured of this disease.
UPDATE
The escape has been delayed after the sale of my flat fell through due to cladding debacle this government has managed to create. Boring story.
Having thoroughly enjoyed unemployment for almost four months, I reluctantly decided to get another mortgage to avoid the base rate and to accept a three months’ contract at the North East London Clinical Commissioning Group to replenish the travel money I’ve been living on. Big bummer but sensible, as much as I hate being sensible. Hoped I’d be packing bags in August but here I am still in the cladded prison in Feb 23! Ffs.
GOODBYE ENGLAND
After almost 28 years in London, planning to travel from my hometown, Pejë, in Kosovo, to Tokyo along the Silk Road, which has been the oldest highway of ideas, cultures, and stories for almost two millennia.
The page contains thoughts, ramblings and attempted humour as well as some of my creations during the pandemic, which helped me keep sane in a world that is making less and less sense. Having neglected my artistic side for most of my adult life, working 9 - 5, I have finally decided to close that chapter and open a new one.
I made my first collage less than a year ago and first digital painting less than a month ago. I have a lot to learn…
I have not had any formal training but I’ve always been interested in artistic expression in all its forms. No training in web design either, as you can see. I have no intention of building a cutting edge website or win obscure prizes in the cyber world but hoping to learn as I go along.
Theresa May described people like me as 'citizens of nowhere' - well, I actually agree with her. All countries and none are mine; she can cling on to her hop fields of Berkshire if she wants
14 December 2021
(and fuck whatever needs to be fucked, especially Brexit and capitalism)
QE2 is the longest reigning monarch in English history. Her namesake, QE1 reigned almost as long and it can be safely said both are remarkable women, who oversaw big changes in society and government. During the reign of the first, England was established as a Protestant power not to be messed with while the first green shoots of the Empire that was to come sprang up, The current Queen also saw seismic sociopolitical changes, during her long reign - the dismantling of the empire, end of the Cold War, witnessed Margaret Thatcher dissecting and selling off the soul of the nation (and many more calamities brought upon the country by this obnoxious political party that has been slowly destroying the last bits of decency in the UK), EU membership, Brexit, Bozza Blowjob, as well as as many big events that shaped both this country and the world. I am no monarchist but have a deep respect for the current queen. When she goes, the rest of them should too.
SERIES 12
Religion has been an interest since childhood but more as an spectator. I did go through a fairly long period trying to convince myself to be a good Catholic but it always left me with more questions than answers. Now, as an agnostic, religion still fascinates, infuriates and bewilders me simultaneously.. Even Buddhism has shown some teeth. If there is a God as we imagine him/her/it, they would not approve of any of the current organised religions. I am sure of it.
Art is life. Life is art too. A life without art is a life of a plant. Sorry, plants. Even the worst art is better than the best spreadsheet. It's meant to awaken our senses, feelings, thoughts... not pockets. In a country where education is very poor, art needs to step in and come down to the level of the populace to educate them with pictures instead of moving further and further away in the stratosphere of narcissism and high finance.
There is no doubt that amazing art is being created as we speak. A real artist is always free from convention and dogma... there are plenty of them around.
However, I think a lot of contemporary art is total tosh and very self indulgent in its abstraction and obsession with fame and money. They have kicked Bohemia out of art.. art is meant to be dirty, shocking, beautiful, enlightening... we must never read a review before going to an art exhibition, cinema or theatre. It should have a different meaning for each viewer. Why be influenced by some so called critic who makes a living by poncing around and having free drinks at opening nights.
I have lived a very unorthodox life and have tried to break conventions of all guises. Especially if they are rooted in the dreaded bourgeois so called values. I especially like to ridicule and shock the middle classes. There's no doubt that some of the greatest people are either really posh or really poor... the middlings are the most uninspiring layer; I include myself to be a product of this group of creatures who strive to coat everything with a layer of Farrow & Ball respectability'... (well, we had Polikolor in Kosovo). The days of 'being born in the purple' in old Byzantium are long gone, sadly. 😂
Unfortunately, art has become middle class, bourgeois, petty, too abstract, too vague and soulless - the building blocks of the petite bourgeoisie. Sticking a banana on a wall and having a light switch itself on and on bollocks, for example. Ludicrous.. Where are the scandals?? We have to snatch it back from them. Fiona Bruce may get upset, however.
Since numerous lockdowns and semi-lockdowns during Covid-19 pandemic, I’ve been trying to re kindle my artistic side through creating haphazard collages and digital paintings to satirise and comment on the political melodrama in the UK, which has been gripped in a cycle of self-destruction, divisions and decline. Although most often I try to show from a humorous angle, this has not always been possible… I am still learning about digital art and don’t consider my collages to be the next Damien Hirst but I’ve had quite few requests to sell them as posters, which is great. The cost mainly covers the printing and posting… please contact me if interested in any of the collages either here or through the links to my shop on Etsy.
#reclaimart
#nevermainstream
#fuckcapitalism
Capitalism is the cause and root of all ills in today’s world. It is a system that puts a price on anything and turns people into commodities. It is soulless, calculated and murderous, in worst cases. It is a system in which the vast majority of the people are expected to work for a tiny minority in a relentless race to outdo each other. Its foundations are: privilege, inequality and speculation worshipping profit at all costs. Its daily liturgy perforked for the public sings endëess hymns of freedom and entrrprise, putting the populace in a transe of self-deceipt fed by debt and consunption.
It dows not recognise or respect local history, traditions or environment if it stands in the way of making profit for parasitic shareholders who expect to have a great life without having to do anything to earn the money they spend on things they don’t need. It has turned the world into a ticking bomb as billions of people have been condemned to live in extreme poverty without any comforts the parasites take for granted… .. the main culprit and benefactor of this bloodsucking system is the so called west but USA and UK by far outweigh the damage done to the world due to their extreme version of capitalism that has been forced on the world by two ruthless ideologues who wanted to create a society in which no one cares about anyone. Those shameful names are Margaret Thatcher and Ronald Reagan…
However, their so called solutions were very short term and the damage they’ve caused is rapidly falling apart, causing a rise of nationalist/populist ideologies that will cause more damage. UK will be by far in a worse position as it sees itself increasingly isolated.
We need to replace this rotten system before it replaces us. In order to do this, we need to move on from 19th century politics and make democracy real and representative. The current political parties, especially in the USA and UK are not fit to lead the next generation into a better future because they neither have the ideas or the desire to change their position of relative privilege in a dual party system supported by a rigged electoral system to keep things as they are for eternity, which may have been possible if the internet wasn’t invented… but it was. It is not possible to keep people in their place as easy as it used to be by getting them to sing patriotic songs or cheap mortgages. … its rapid decline is inevitable. Finally.
Citizens across the world are connected more than ever before but our hope lies with young people, whose ideology transcends borders, race, religion, income … I wish them all the best because my generation has really screwed up. I am really sorry.
The most incongruous alliance of very rich right wing ideologues and swathes of people without hope of a better life have come together under the banner of a man, who is a mix between a clown and a swine, doing Nigel Farage's dirty work. This is stuff of fiction except that it is very real.
This is a man with neither truth nor conviction, who tragically is the current prime minister. I never mention his name as I feel pronouncing his name will somehow defile me. I am not sure how but the feeling of defilement is very real.
The rest of them? I don't know where to start - the super creepy Jacob Rees-Mogg and John Redwood, slimy Gove, pigheaded Francois, stupid Raab, disgraceful Truss, cringy Leadsom, Pointless Williamson…and that pure evil, Hindley-like, Patel?? I can't bear them. I have to shout at the radio every time their name is mentioned.
This bizarre panto show will fall like a house of cards. Their over promising will be their undoing as in the old saying: 'the populace always devours the populist'... it should be fun to watch but difficult to laugh after all the damage they have caused. Shame I won't be here to see. I have a bottle of Moët since 2019 that needs opening when the swine is toppled.
December 2019
A rapturous nation runs out of bunting on top of the cost of living crisis, travel chaos, high inflation and other calamities that keep falling upon the Sceptred Isle!
To resolve the issue, I have especially designed bunting that is made of molecular models of Platinum, Crack Cocaine and Ethanol. #platinumjubilee
Boris Johnson is the most deplorable man that's ever lived in UK - he has neither truth nor conviction - only self interest. The damage he has caused this country and its reputation are irreparable! Best example to confirm Socrates' and Plato's dislike for democracy, which they both thought was a deeply flawed system ... (because there is always a risk we could end up with a Boris de Pfeffel Johnson)
The current discourse. obsessions and divisions dominating every aspect of life inthe UK remind me very much of the circumstances in ex Yugoslavia in late 80s unfortunately. Talke back control nonsense brought Milosevic to power and esxcited the populace, who were stirred into stupor by fanning old hatreds and and creating new objects of hate through frenetic sloganeering and flag waving. After him, counter Milosevices sprang up all over the place. We had no idea they existed. I ran away from rabid nationaism in my my 20s, hoping never to encounter this false ideoplogy again but it cought me again here. Nothing has felt the same since that depressing morning in June 2016.
I have lived in UK longer than anywhere else and consider it to be 'my' country but, in fact, I only own a one bedroom flat in Deptford; I have cried for England in every World Cup and Euro Cup but not in the last time as something had snapped. I simply could not identify with what it is becoming. Tories will bear the badge of shame for ever for dragging us all down with them. They are England's cancer stuck in the 18th century.
They won't succeed in turning England into a paranoid little island of no significance. England will find the cure but it's a shame I won't be here to see it.
17 Dec 2022
I had my last team meeting today. It felt so strange. Did I spend almost five years doing this? As Marcus Aurelius said: most of what we say is unnecessary and refraining from saying it would save both ntime and trouble. This is especially the case for a council department. I doodled and said cheeky things. I've smelt freedom all week...
HR are creating one almighty humdrum about my last day at work because they can't think outside the Oracle schmorackle. A classic case of 'computer says no'. I should have finished already but I am 'needed' until Thursday. I suggested to the poor drones I could always invoice them consultant fees to make it easier. I await their all important verdict. (If Romans had HR, I wonder who’d be their god ? Probably that boring but necessary Vesta?)
Some busybody from finance was asking inane questions... I stopped replying. Finance types would probably not even have a god in Rome.
Despite the snags, I am very proud to have worked in local government. Even more so as it was the borough I live in. Local Governent does a far better job and makes more of a difference to local communities. I've met great people both in the council and parter agencies we commissioned to deliver services throughout the pandemic - a situation no one could have prepared us for. I would especially like to mention homecare providers, who managed to deliver every single homecare package to people who can't feed or clean themselves... it was tough but it was done. Not with the help of central government, who were more interested in redecorating the press room.
Despite the enormous pressure, it felt good to be part of the solution. We all need to pat ourselves on the back but especially Care Workeres, who were always the last ones on our Clown-Swine PM's list. They did this on less money than the check out person in Asda.
A society that pays a carer less than a spreadsheet manager who can't run a T&T system after spending 34 billion pounds on it hasn't got much to be proud of. Despite the relentless flag shagging and waving that the Clown and his vampires are so keen on.
Is home. I love Depford. It has history, drama, cheap shops, excellent Vietnamese restaurants, a Bitcoin take-away shop, art, our own St Paul's, a mohican wearing gay vicar, screaming evangelists, arguing couples, trendy hipsters, old Londoners, black and white, born and bred in SE8, Greggs, Manzies,... the ghosts of Christopher Marlowe and his murderer in St Nicholas' churchyard, Christians, Muslims, Buddhists, atheists and communists... and we all get along fine. I actually know my neighbours... (we even have an unofficial theatre that held unofficial classical music concerts in their backyard during lockdown. Tut, tut. Ah well.. they were outside and socially distanced. I could hear them from my bedroom. I loved it.) It takes all sorts to make a Deptford, that's undeniable.
I will probably always have one thing I wish I had achieved - to reopen at least one of the 13 pubs #Deptford once had on the High Street. I will miss Deptford, enormously.
More to come about the dearest postcode of mine: SE8
Hometown. One and only. There is nowhere in the world that makes me feel like Pejë, even after 30+ years of not living there. Just one view of the Rugova Gorge and the Cursed Mountains awaken a very unique sense of myself. I feel it as if it was the love of my life. Still. I am a Pejon, through and through.
More to come.
A lot of stuff among which 30kg of coke flushed daily, having gone through the kidneys. According to my calculatioms, this comes to about 2.6 grams in per person, which is quite a HIGH when yiu take babies, the sick, the old, the religious, our of the equation, well, not all the rekigious… happy Londoners, eh?
Yes. Somevof them enyway. Evilutional residue.. a bit like inventing the propeller apparently.. They knew they workec in water before they tried them in the air.. Nature works a bit like that… try, keep, modufy
Radio 4 is discussing sex parties. It is Friday after all… we’ve been having them for ever apparently but there is a resurgence of naughty gatherings all over the land because the apps are making it all so much easier. This is being discussed in Women’s Hour. Good old WH…. ;)
Lovely educated voices talking empire yet again. Today, they explore Britons' views and relationship with the long dead empire. The learned guests conclude the empire was seen as a great achievement of commerce and progress, not as a machine of conquest and exploitation. That's alright then. Put the kettle on..
Today's discussion is about the introduction of the handshake to meet and greet people, instead of bowing, curtsying and lifting the skirt. It started in the Georgian era and it was a seen as a compromise to smooth out greeting habits between countries. It was also a more egalitarian way of greeting people, apparently... well, we are still waiting for equality to take effect so I will put a question mark to that.
We are being enlightened today about the difference between vagina and vulva! Vagina is inside, Vulva is outside, including clitoris, which makes it rude.. or did make it rude. Vulvas are fine now. R4 recons the Vulva War will be won. I had no idea there was a war on.
Just when you think you've heard it all before, they pick the topić of FUNGAL SEX!! They have a great time it seems... they indivualism, take risks, use biological weapons, etc. Who said being a mushroom was boring!!
He is simply amazing. Discussing Thomas Hardy's poetry this morning, which we know little about.. where does he find these experts to talk so passionately about all sorts of subjects. Hardy was 'churchy' but he believed God was dead. He was writing about the death of religion, which must have been a Good thing at a time when blimd faith in God and Empire was unquestionable. He didn't believe in either. I like him more now.
R4 are gushing away this morning about Russia's meddling in Afghanistan! As usual, they they have invited an expert from the master country, who explains everything in his American drawl... it's all terrible. Russia and China, virtueless, authoritarian, brutish, etc., are the villain enemies of freedom and commerce while 'we' valiantly defend those as beacons of truth and decency! If one didn't know history, one would send their children to this Sunday school run by old pimps and drug dealers. You may even shed a tear and wave metaphorical (or real) flag. The arch meddlers crying wolf. It is astonishing how they do this without a splinter of shame... this is because it is so easy to tell a fantastic narrative to a vastly uneducated populace which understands the world through Gogglebox and Game of Thrones. It's both hilarious and infuriating. The Angkosohere is stuck in 18th century and its desperate need to tell itself tales of superiority and valour.. give it another t3n years and it will have crashed its face against the mirror..
Turned on the radio as the overrated national treasure, Stephen Fry, was talking about 'the first epistle of St Paul to the Zimbabweans started with the word Camel' - well it would be, wouldn't it. Surely they are not able to talk about anything else? So annoyed I missed it so not sure what that was all about.
The Beeb think Joseph was decent but possibly boring and a bit of a mug. Bless him.
It is very easy to be angry about Brexit. It’s very easy to despair about the most monumental act of self harm in history. It’s very easy to pack up and leave….. but, like everything else, Brexit needs to be put into context!
We live in a strange time in history, especially in the so called West, which seems to have been stripped of a solid belief system, ideals or sense of belonging, where an aggressive form individualism has become the norm. We are constantly bombarded with simulated realities in which the individual has to fight the world single-handedly under immense pressure to be ‘happy’… outwardly, anyway. This happiness more or less has a very basic aim: validation by conforming to the norms of superimposed consumerism.
Since the 60s, and much more aggressively since the 80s, a weird post-modernist culture has enveloped every aspect of life. It’s become a form of hyper-reality, which blurs the lines and aims to be more exciting than real life! It’s a culture that has increasingly become more voyeuristic, snoopy, judgemental… paradoxically, conformist and isolating in equal measure, where struggling individuals are constantly bombarded with images and messages which simulate a reality in which we have to achieve, grow, stand out in a world of unlimited possibilities!!! In so many ways, people are forced to live a double life: an inner, hidden life full of anxieties, questions, dilemmas… and a public life in which we are constantly beaming with ‘happiness and achievement’… weakness is either punished or fetishised in a perpetual state of victimhood. We have become a schizophrenic society, full of confusing and conflicting images that so many people are finding difficult to navigate; I don't thnk you can’t blame them.
It is clear that wild capitalism propagated by Neo-Liberals as the new religion that has no other ideal but personal wealth has failed in its own game. This cut-throat capitalism that only believes in the sanctity of the markets has created a culture of vulgarity, spite and fear. We have stopped believing in or striving to build a better future collectively… instead, we are forced to believe is unbridled consumerism, which, in fact, is both ugly and soulless…
So how is someone struggling on minimum wage in Rochdale or Scunthorpe going to fit in this brave new world? Well, he isn’t meant to fit in. He or she is surplus to requirement. He or she has failed to be happy and it must be someone’s fault - a perfect territory for little fascists like Nigel Farage and a shameless opportunist like Boris Johnson to step in and offer them a very simple solution - leave EU so that we can build a Britannic Utopia of milk and honey where English people can be proud again (falsely creating a narrative that this is currently not possible)!! Brexit is a particularly British response to a global problem of an economic and cultural ideology, it would be unfair to say that it’s worse in the UK… Fascism is creeping back in all kinds of forms in Europe and in America. Russia has already fallen into the claws of rabid nationalism, which is fascism in all but name..
I wish I could guess how it will all go… it feels we are on the edge of a very deep ravine but it also feels like we just need to reach the next turn that will take us into a new, fairer, kinder, reasonable future. The entire world seems to be in turmoil so it would be silly to expect it would somehow bypass UK.
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Love your art Bekim - vibrant and visceral! Looking forward to following your adventures. Bon Voyage!
An exciting new chapter. We will follow your progression and look forward to lots of subversive adventures. Bon voyage.
my best wishes for your new chapter :-)